because every time i turn on music
i can't help but move to the beat
sweat stains and my
carpet is purple
-not quite a haiku
I'm really not great at remembering things, so this post here is for my bad memory.
i. I wrote so freaking much this month, on my tumblr, on here (who am i?), in my journal/random pages of paper, a zine, and I'm really proud because I've been pushing myself to work on writing more because althought it's tedious, and i hate revision, it's very cathartic, and it's a way to keep track of stuff and days and whether it's a poem or an angry rant list, something comes of it.
ii. MY ZINE, '31 days of missed connections' as of right now I'm editing like hell and making a file to send to the printer ppl so they can make copies at a decent price and so I can send them to (a viewer like you!!). Basically i pushed myself----past the frigging writing limits, i wrote on a public platform every day (my choice was craiglist > missed connections) and no matter what I managed to write something everyday (whether short or long) and I tried my best not to recycle ideas but it just sorta happened. I still feel a bit poopy and wish I was a better writer, but the 'process' of doing thing project made me realize that it takes a bunch of bad stuff to get to good stuff, it's really cliche i know. but it's true, for every 15 bad poems, i made a couple of shining rare gems, that i'm surprised I even wrote.
iii. feeling sad but letting it pass. I hate with all my being the saying 'this too shall pass' but i have to give it some credit. With mostly college rejections, missing my friends, feeling left out, not wanting to go to school, and depression saying bad things to me, I've really needed something to help me push through. Sometimes it's just going to bed early (i know, it's an artist's nightmare), sometimes it's trusting the universe, getting advice from wise ppl aka hannah, and letting that feeling pass, because the strange thing about it is, feelings are like 100% felt when you're an adolescent (or so I've heard) that means the good is 100 and the bad is 100. But however high the efficiency of your feeling, just like every other one, it will die down, it will pass, waiting sucks ass. But I find taking a walk, kinda helps. Find that thing, or just keep telling yourself, 'this too shall pass.' (don't listen to Drake just yet, he makes me salty when im sad)
iv. STAY OFF THE INTERNET (not 24/7 but yeah 24/7) i feel like a hypocrite writing this, but part of this month for me was staying off tumblr until the 27th (i kinda sorta did it, but i also cheated a bunch). It helped to have plans with friends, that way you can't just be on your tumblr app the whole time or you'll miss something. It also pushed me to go skate more, and do art (even though I'm crap at it), and read (mostly graphic novels, but a couple paperbacks). I'm gonna keep going with this one, because tumblr and articles and the internet and blogs are great, but there needs to be some kinda balance, DONT GET SUCKED INTO THE VOID. (lol)
i'm not sure any of this is coherent
okay but in april i've got some more things im tryna do
- practice ollie's every other day
- make papier mache clay and scuplt some peoples hands and faces
- talk about myself in my journal (i know, but it's hard for me most times)
- send ppl letters and packages
- finish notes and outlines and rough drafts for my first short film project thing
- write diff. posts on blog, like reviews, movie stuff etc. (changeeee)
- play a good song in the morning
- non-fic books?
root beer is great and so are you,
casey
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